1. |
STANDARDIZED
02:21
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both ends cauterize same direction
I stand readily at attention
loop holes threatening my inventions
making up the time for
here's emily yelling once more
i sink I slip through the floor
the octagonal trap door
it's already time for
both ends cauterize something's burning
time-tested jealous yearning
conditioned kind of learning
but have I made enough time for myself?
In lieu of all the else
remove me from my shelf
confused by power roles
construed them as my own
when one plus none is one
it identifies the sum
when I plus you is me
there exists false identity
Supine, I contemplate divide
I could lay it out in different ways so many times
She just wants to be alive
unwilling towards a pension for the standardized
who are you to deny?
a life for a life
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2. |
JEST
02:43
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Grass stains on my jeans
I was never too hard to please
Blue-green harmony
At least I thought it so
The white dog came and went
I refrained from grief
I just slept it away
You hate everything
I'm finding it hard to agree
Death serves to relieve
At least they told me so
The white dog came and went
I refrained from grief
I just slept it away
But when the brown dog left
I cursed and I wept in an innocent jest
though I knew not what I meant
There was a sad restraint from a duly sad embrace
(who do I really miss?)
I don't want to know how to live
(I know)
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3. |
POCKET HYMNAL
01:58
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Retreat to my castle within
I sing my songs like a blue book hymnal
A worn pair of brown leather gloves
meant something to someone close to me
When will I transform to the protagonist I've framed out
hospitably offering a hand out
Instead of biting the skin before it swallows me
I can be whole or home, never both
It's a push pin into a cork board
the thin needle's signature
into my palm I press a hatred tied to the things I love the most
I'm oh so close to a rapture
I'm calling some pseudo-disaster
I wanna make home in my own skull
I wanna be born from the inside out
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4. |
OF THE BEHOLDER
02:59
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by lamplight
read books of old times and old fights
they allow a new life
by blue light
watch sci fi re-runs all night
with both eyes glued to the tv tube
it's all alright
my head is fixed on a landscape
a puzzle partially displaying a transient place
and I'd offer a piece just to play along
but I'm stuck wondering where I belong
or if I belong at all
the basement is full of fixtures
how the scene changes and I'm hardly missing out
I don't wanna
I never wanted to talk about myself
sidestepping questions of cranial health
exchange is optional
though so improbable
while
my
head
my head is fixed on a landscape
I find my place above the foliage casting my rays through space
all for naught such a lame act
gathering facts about something impractically lacking
like
my severed head on a dinner plate
I reinvent my death in numerous humorous ways until
My keeper's screaming from my little lie
says, "the trolls all play outside"
and "it'll all play out in time"
But I'm fine being alone
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5. |
ROTTEN THINGS
01:02
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"tell me why you're really sad
i promise it won't hurt so bad
the calendar counts up and down
again"
I'm not sure if you should hold me
spoiled rotten things you told me
I don't want to be alone with you
you knew
didn't you
knew you
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6. |
ATONIC
02:47
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a crowd coordinates a symphony score
i cheer on a few notes beneath the tonic chord
it's not a choice
it is my natural voice
but in your absence who is to blame?
strung between my solitude and family name
there is no right or wrong this go-around
i want to
well what would my brother do
if i knew
I'd do that too
well what would my brother do
if he knew
he'd tell me too
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7. |
HAND & HAND
03:10
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She'll make cards to trick the brain to better ways
It's hard to cheat a game I've never played
a full hand fades
She'll trace centimeter arcs along the veins
I misread the maps we etched in place
yet there is no shame
I'm on top now
I don't feel good about
hand & hand in hand
I have lost a friend
hand & hand in hand
I need you again
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MAXAMILLION RAXATRILLION Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
MRS
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